Category: comedy
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Technology – Fire
Man has known fire for 6000 years James has never known a campfire James tried to replenish a dying ember The ember still gave off heat James had two faggots He went to place the first in the dying fire The heat burned James’ hand He dropped the second faggot On another’s foot He writhed…
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Porcelain prison
I hear my stomach gurgle, it’s coming down again. I ain’t had fresh air for all of an hour I’m stuck in Porcelain prison and my ass keeps shooting out. My stomach keeps on gurgling. I wonder what I ate. When I went to Mexico, my friend said not to drink the water, but I…
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Collecting Welfare: The Bud Ice Dilemma
Country life in Arkansas is one of limited adventures and all sorts of trouble. Too poor to work, too young to collect welfare. Dang I wish I wasn’t a boy. The girls collect them checks for not knowing who their baby daddies are. My youth was a time that I remember with fondness. Alright not…
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Gym tips
Zac’s tips for the gym First, let me start this right Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. These will be placed in no uncertain order That’s all I have for now.
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Memento of a Fireball
Why, oh why, did command choose this day to invade?! The air is hot and warm outside the plane, Many must have thought that they would be too busy to protect in midst of their celebration. This is not the case, For at the start of July, They have more anti-air than all of Europe…
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Pepper Paper
I was a beat cop Once upon a time After working my shift 12 hours on my feet I was tired I went home I took off my gun belt and hung it up I reclined in my ez chair And sat in the dark room And eased into blissful sleep My blissful slumber is…
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Who took the keys?
Who took the keys? Where have they gone? They were right here ten minutes ago. On my desk, Corner of my office, Where are my keys? I’ll shout and I’ll yell until the villains are apprehended. My secretary calls my attention to my left hand. There are my keys, In my left hand. I am…
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Ode to my Ceramic Throne
You are the one that, I visit at the end of the day, You have seen it all, And rarely complain, You can consume anything, Nary a sound is heard, You gurgle and grumble, You get clogged, But I wash you with, Solutions to the problems that I caused, You have known my deepest thoughts,…
The In Constant Chronicles 