As I prepare myself for what may be a grand adventure 

I look back on my life and reflect

On was as been accomplished 

For the next stage of a well prepare training montage. 

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I have been brought up in an outstanding 

Christian household with a loving discipline 

All the strictness and kindness 

Was done to better prepare me for life

My parents knew that a good life could not be handed out

One should work to make the best of life

Cheap is good, free is better

Not to say that my parents didn’t spend money

They were just wise about how the money was spent

They talked all the time 

Mom about the here and now 

Dad about the future 

They balanced each other quite well.

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My older siblings seemed all but ready to leave out from my parents rule

My oldest brother joined the army as soon as he could, 

My second brother stuck around and slept at the house but was rarely home otherwise

My sister was married as soon as she could

If my parents were harsh to my siblings

Their concern was only because they worried that they screwed up somewhere

I know their minds best because I have been around the longest

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It’s not to said that I haven’t moved out

I did once

I lived on my own for six years

I learned to cook 

I follow instructions and recipes

I was always tinkering with my truck

It was sink or swim

But luckily I had instilled in me a discipline to soldier on 

I never gave up

And if I need mom and dad

They were a phone call away

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I have moved back in with them

For a little while

With the hope that

I will move out again

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I am a well traveled individual 

I have a passport 

I have seen the world outside the haven known as the USA

Russia is cold and bleak

Canada is apologetic and dark

Israel is sunny and a perfect temperature

I have seen the world and I know that I am meant for more than touring

People suffer 

Is it my fault?

No.

Is it my parents’ fault?

No.

Is it God’s fault?

No.

It is the evil of men. 

When good men do nothing, that is evil enough. Edmund Burke

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I am a good man

Or I have strived to be so.

So I if continue to sit back and relax, am I evil?

My life’s endeavor since middle school has been to join the army

Ever since I saw those towers collapse 

As two jets plowed into them

My world changed

I saw that a country considered safe was dented and bruised

I sought to be stronger than I was deemed to be

But every time I tried to enlist

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I was denied

Too Fat 2007

Too tall 2009

You got braces 2010

You’re flat footed 2012

You can’t run a mile 2018

COVID 2020

I was denied six times 

I was denied from six different recruiters 

When I was younger I had the drive and metabolism to go farther

But know with age comes wisdom and aches

But my fire is still alive and burning.

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So now I wait 

I am back with my parents for now

I am without employment 

But not without reason

I am training

ALWAYS Training 

My parents taught me to be disciplined

My siblings moved on

It is just me now

I am seeking to be a good man. 

Perhaps in waiting a bit longer 

Another good thing will happen and I can move on too.